


The Lost Year

by artsyspikedhair



Category: Girl Meets World
Genre: Family Issues, Gen, Mental Health Issues, Mental Institutions, Post-Episode: s03e08-09 Girl Meets Ski Lodge, Sexual Assault, Spoilers for Episode: s03e08-09 Girl Meets Ski Lodge, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-12
Updated: 2016-08-12
Packaged: 2018-08-08 06:01:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7745926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artsyspikedhair/pseuds/artsyspikedhair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Farkle knows Lucas isn't telling him something. So he asks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Lost Year

Farkle knows Lucas isn't telling him something, isn't telling them all something There's a difference between getting expelled and losing a year of your life. Farkle knows that Lucas doesn't fight unless he has a good reason to. And when Zay showed up, Farkle thought that Zay was his reason. But after Lucas' anger at Maya's rule breaking, Farkle feels like something is different. He feels like Lucas is keeping his past vague and hidden for a reason. And Farkle, though he loves his friends, does not do well with vaguely referenced secrets.

So Farkle does what scientists do: he conducted an experiment. "Lucas?" he asks. Lucas is sitting next to him. They're on the bus ride home from the ski lodge, after a final day of actual skiing (which Farkle surprisingly loved) and one final nature hike. 

"Yeah?" Lucas says, expecting a question about his choosing Riley. 

"Why did you get so upset about Maya breaking the rules on the nature hike?" 

"Because she doesn't know the area and something could have happened to her. And she could get in trouble. Breaking rules leads to bad things. You should know that." Lucas feels angry at himself, but he isn't sure why. He should be happy. Farkle is making him lose himself in memories of the last time he broke rules. He doesn't want to think about that. Luckily, Farkle opens his stupid mouth at the right moment. 

"Lucas, if I ask you a question, can you promise to be honest with me?" Farkle knows he's being manipulative, but his curiosity is killing him and nobody is listening to their conversation. 

Lucas says "Yes" before thinking about the consequences. He feels sick inside when he hears the question. 

"What really happened in Texas that made you come to New York?" 

"No. Farkle, you, you tricked me! I trusted you not to ask me an intensely personal question and you tricked me!" Farkle merely laughs, infuriating Lucas further. 

"I did no such thing. I asked you a question, a perfectly reasonable question about why you are in New York. And you are now under oath to answer it." 

"Or what?" Lucas says, mentally preparing himself to tell the story. 

"Or I'll tell your football coach about that time you and Zay sneaked under the bleachers and did pot. Yeah, I know your secrets. I could smell it on ya!" Farkle says this last bit so convincingly Lucas laughs. 

"Okay, okay. It all started in sixth grade. I became kind of friends with this boy who was on the baseball team with me. Zay told me he was bad news, but I didn't listen. He was nice enough to me, but a lot of the girls in our grade didn't like him. I had no idea why, not- not back then. We weren't really friends though. He liked to make fun of me, told me I threw like a girl. I didn't think much of it of at the time. Guys on sports teams are like that. He used to say he thought I was hiding something. I wanted him to like me though. I wanted everyone to like me. I was different back then. I protected Zay from jerks who made his life hell, but at the same time, on the team I'd pal around with them. I was a- a bit of a hypocrite, I guess." 

"How did Zay feel about all this?" 

"He didn't know a thing about it. He was really into ballet, and didn't do any other sports. Anyway, this one day in around February, the boy I've been telling you about, he asked me to skip class with him. And I- I was like Maya, I guess. I didn't care much for rules. So I went with him. I shouldn't have. I really shouldn't have." Lucas blinks quickly, trying to stop himself from crying. 

"Lucas, are you okay? You don't have to continue if-" 

"No, Farkle, I'm going to tell you this. You're my best friend. You should know. Anyway, we went into the woods. " Lucas' talking speeds up as he tries desperately not to cry. "And I was strong, but this kid was stronger. He really was. And he told me he didn't believe I was a real man. I was confused, and I almost asked him what he meant, but he pinned me down. The ground was cold and wet and he took my pants off and... and..." Lucas gives in and begins crying. 

"Lucas, I- I'm sorry. You didn't have to-" 

"He didn't rape me, if that what you're thinking. He rolled me over and stuck his foot up my butt. It was awful, but it wasn't something I could tell anyone about. I'd be the laughingstock of the town. I mean, I already am now but that's because of what I did after. 

"Lucas- that's sexual assault! He should be in jail." 

"No. I let it happen to me." Farkle mutters bullshit under his breath Lucas continues like he doesn't hear. "Anyway, it's too late now. The only people who know are you and Zay. Anyway, after that I began getting into fights with anyone who even looked at me wrong. I couldn't take seeing his face, so I quit baseball. Zay realized soon that something was wrong. I told him, and at first he laughed about it, saying that was funny, the idea I would let something like that happen to me. The next day I tried to kill myself." 

"What?" Farkle was shocked, both that Zay would be so cruel and that Lucas would do something so drastic.

"I failed, obviously. This was around May. I got put into a psych ward for eight months. Zay visited me in the hospital. We made up. I didn't tell the doctors why I did it. I lied and got put on antidepressants. I had nightmares about him. My father basically disowned me after that, not wanting a mental case for a son, and I was sent up here to live with my mother.That's why we stayed with Pappy Joe in Texas. 

"That's awful. I- I'm so sorry." 

"It's fine. All the past, right?" Lucas gives a pained grin. 

"Lucas, I think you should tell an adult about this. It sounds like you might have PTSD!" 

"No! No, I can't talk to anyone about this. What if they don't believe me?" 

"Lucas, I believe you. Mr. Matthews would believe you. You don't have to do this, but you should. It might help you." 

"I'll think about it." Lucas says, not making any plans on doing so in the near future. 

The bus ended up in the Abigail Adams parking lot minutes later.


End file.
